Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Will you give A Gift?

Tuesday, December 2, 2008


Our staff received a letter from bj today and i wanted to share with you the horror:
( )Happy Holidays! Here's a gift certificate for an abortion

Here's an original holiday gift idea to help the person who may have everything, including a little something they don't really want. A new way to mark the festive yearend celebration of life -- a gift certificate for an abortion. This year, for the first time, Planned Parenthood of Indiana is offering holiday gift certificates for that certain someone in your life who may want a breast exam, a pap smear or perhaps not want another life in their life. Calling them an "unusual yet practical gift this holiday season," the organization is selling gift certificates in $25 denominations, redeemable at any of the group's 35 statewide locations for their services. There's even an online page to order the certificates if you know someone in Indiana who desires such services. According to Ms. magazine, an official of the Hoosier Planned Parenthood group explained: "People are making really tough decisions about putting gas in their car and food on their table, so we know that many women especially put healthcare at their bottom of their list to do." The organization performs about 5,000 abortions a year, according to one published figure, out of 92,000 patients treated. Indiana's health commissioner, Judy Monroe, ignores the mounting political denunciations and calls the idea "really a meaningful gift." It has taken a few days for antiabortion groups to move beyond disbelief and begin commenting on the Christmas holiday sales item.
Indiana's Right to Life president, Mike Fichter, calls the Christmas gift certificates "a mockery" of a holiday designed to celebrate life by "peddling new ways to promote its destruction."Christmas," said Jim Sedlak of the American Life League, "perhaps more than any other time of the year, is dedicated to the miracle of life and divine love." He said the gift cards "would be more accurately described as death certificates." "The tragedy is that almost 6,000 fewer children will be celebrating a first Christmas this year," he said, "because they were aborted in Planned Parenthood's Indiana clinics."
--Andrew Malcolm

OK, I am so angry I almost screamed!!!! I wish I could go those centers and say: "Look at me! Look at my sister, look at my brother, look at Faith and Nora and the thousands of other adopted children. Are we only worth a 25$ gift certificate?! Is that what you equate the cost of giving birth and aborting?! Is the time you spent paying someone to make the Gift certificate look efficient, maybe even a little catchy and cute worth more than what it costs to kill a baby!!?

My anger stems more for the fact that it is going to be wrapped like a gift and GIVEN as a gift!! I see it now “give the gift of death with a bow!” “Do you Love them enough to Kill?” My anger is that a person is not going to go out and buy themselves a gift certificate. NO! They are going out and BUYING death to give it to SOMEONE ELSE and right at Christmas!! How Satan works astonishes me. Not only is the real meaning of Christmas (Christ’s BIRTH- the beginning of our salvation) smeared and stomped in the ground by the selfish and greedy theme of giving gifts and wanting more and more ,while thousands of children and families die, BUT now we have Satan advertising DEATH as another gift to give! He is trying to cover up Christ’s birth with the blood of abortion (a child’s DEATH) just like he did at His beginning. We all know that Satan used Herod as a tool to try to cover or get rid of Jesus’ birth by the killing of innocent 2yrs. and below baby boys. We read about it in the Bible or see a movie that tells the whole story of Christ. We grit our teeth or hide our eyes as the shadows on the walls depicts how a soldier went about killing a baby boy. How those babies screamed but they were drown out by the screams of MOTHERS!! MOTHER who actually loved their babies! Now it is happening again and this time “the soldiers and king” Satan is using is: Planned Parenthood Centers-KING, and the SOLDIERS are- mother, fathers, friends, cousins, aunts, and husbands, wives, boyfriends and girlfriends.
In a court room their isn’t just one or two people who are found guilty in my book. It is the people who agree to formulate the idea, the people who design it, the people who print it, the centers and all employees who agree to offer it, the people who buy the “Gift”, the female who comes in to cash in the certificate, and the doctor who performs it! what’s more astonishing, is that all of those people are BEING paid (just like Judas was to crucify our Lord) per person in 1 day possibly in one hour more than what it costs to buy a damn 25$ or more give certificate of death.
It is hard for me on a personal level to even find the words to pray or to love, as Christ commanded, these people. Father forgive me. My heart breaks for that child who has so much hate and evil directed towards him/her even when they cannot speak for themselves. But I can say this and with very fiber in my body:
-THANK YOU BIRTH PARENTS- for your willingness to hold onto your baby and give them life.
To my birth mother- thank you for not letting Satan sway you. For loving me enough to give me life.
-THANK YOU ADOPTIVE PARENTS- who have waited, sought, yearned, cried out and had faith that God would give you a child.
To my mom and dad- I love you and am so glad you are my parents. Thank you for waiting patiently on the Lord and for loving me, Dusty, and Julie and even Li with a open heart, an abounding love, and an earnest desire to see us grow into the men and women God has for us.
-THANK YOU PARENTS- that you love your children, you guide them and you chose a path of life for your children!
-And most importantly THANK YOU MY FATHER IN HEAVEN-for giving life and taking the children who die because of our sinful nature, wrapping them on Your loving arms.
Thank you for giving me life, for not letting Satan win, for the assurance that we have the that victory is already won and that death has already been conquered. Thank you for choosing me for this life!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

I was a Mom Today…

I was a Mom Today…

I was a mom today to a child who lost theirs...
I was a mom today for I loved them...
I was a mom today for I felt their fears...
I was a mom today for I held the ones that cried small tears...
I was a mom today when a child recognized me...
I was a mom today when I held her small hand...
I was a mom today when they came crying to me...
I was a mom today when their tears they tried to hide...
I was a mom today when I played in their home...
I was a mom today when they learned from me...
I was a mom today when they came running with pride...
I was a mom today when I cradled them in my arms...
I was a mom today because a child let me in...
I was a mom today because I saw hope begin...

I was a Child today…

I was a child today for I was loved...
I was a child today for I shared their fear...
I was a child today for I was held while tears fell...
I was a child today when I held hands and played...
I was a child today when my tears I tried to hide...
I was a child today when together we cried...
I was a child today when I shared in their home...
I was a child today when I ran to them with pride...
I was a child to today when I learned from them...
I was a child today when they held me in their arms...
I was a child today because a child let me in...
I was a child today because I hoped their hope would begin.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Home again home again gigity gig….

Well, I’m back from Africa and had a God-blessed-broken-friend-filled experience.

I want to share all the moments and experiences with you but I think as the Lord lays them on my heart I will write about them. The first thing I want to tell you about is the three other women on the trip who had such a great impact on my life.

My first roommate on the trip Emilie Miller- lover of God passionate for children- her beautiful smile and giving spirit enlightened me as we bonded and shared moments of sadness, poverty, sickness, love, laughter, sleepiness, sleep talking and walking, support, encouraging conversations, and a surreal understanding of God’s aching desire to use us to love and reach His lost children.

My second Roommate Erika Carew- this bright and courageous woman took my breath away as she embraced every child she came in contact with. Her continuous desire and perseverance throughout the trip to love and serve any baby, child, teen or adult was an inspiration to watch. The moments I was able to talk with her I found her to be insightful, resourceful, and have a deep heart for orphans.

My third roommate Kate Borders- a woman of extreme talents and overflowing love for anyone she meets. From the emails to the on-the-field encounters I felt her heart and it drove me to persevere, to seek out, and to push forward. Courageous and caring Kate was my daily role model of how to live a life of service and selflessness.

The verse that comes to mind if I were asked to sum up my experience with these women of God is this:

Matthew 25:35-45 (NIV) For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.'

Each of these women fed me-

Whether it was Emilie sharing her massive amount of goodies(cookies, power bar, candy etc.), Kate giving me a drink of water from her water bottle or soda, or Erika offering me skittles each of these women fed me on a daily basis. From Seeing Emilie in the morning and at night with an open bible in front of her, bent over as if trying to dive into the bible and see everything first hand, to Erika who expressed and showed God’s love by her actions and sweet words and food for thought, and Kate with her knowledge of the word and it overflowing from her mouth even when a bible was not close at hand. I was fed both spiritually and physically.

Each one of these women helped me when I was sick-

From Kate readily giving me hand sanitizer, Advil, Tylenol, from her magical purse that seemed to have everything, to Emilie who offered sleeping pills when I couldn’t sleep (or maybe so I would sleep deep enough so not to freak her out by talking or walking in my sleep), and from Erika who offered stomach relief medication when I was nauseous or spraying my mosquito nets at night. Each one even made sure my nets were properly tucked in at night.

They clothed me quite literally-

When some of my clothes disappeared after our first guest house we stayed at Emilie- offered me a t-shirt, Kate-lent me her skirt and Erika- lent me flip flops. Between the three of them I had a perfect MATCHING even, outfit! How great is God!

I felt so privileged to have them take part in my baptism. Emilie having the camera eye took the fantastic pictures, Kate and Erika help shield me as I was changing in and out of my dry and wet clothes and all three offered me hugs and encouragement throughout the whole trip.

God is so good to put people in my life that build me up, and inspire and encourage me to carry on! Throughout the trip these girls not only served the children, the church and the community but they served me and words cannot explain how humbled, touched, and encouraged by their selfless acts of love and kindness. Thank you and bless you ladies, from the bottom of my heart.

"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?' "The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'

To Be Continued….

Thursday, August 28, 2008

We need the orphan as much as the orphan needs us

Ok, I must admit, this was a very difficult assignment for me to write. I can usually whip through a writing assignment with ease and confidence. Like with any other assignment I prayed for the right words to say, that they would be worthy enough for God to hear, and eloquently said so others could be inspired. BUT, the right words never came. I actually wrote 4 different times about 4 totally different views and each time I was told “It really just doesn’t answer the question.” You must ask yourself “What need can an orphan fulfill that nothing or no one else can?” I thought to myself “Great, not only am I one of the newbie’s in a Orphan driven organization now I can’t write about an orphan!?” I spent long moments in prayer and meditation asking for the words to come. Then as He always does the Lord spoke to me. I’ve learned its best to listen, so I listened and I believe I am in the process of finding out why I need the orphan. I know they are my passion and I wait in anticipation to see what the Lord is going to do with me and how I will be able to help them. But how do I need them? I know that because the Lord has commanded it and in desiring to be like Jesus we must take up the cross follow in His footsteps and heed His commands. One of those commands is to “Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed. Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked. (Psalm 82:3-4-NIV) In all of God’s commands there are blessings when obeyed. So many times we, in our one track selfish thinking, come to the conclusion that God’s commands are a burden when in reality they are meant to protect, direct, and bless us.
This Poem is my small and humble expression on why I feel, within my journey so far, “We need the orphan as much as the orphan needs us”.

Only then will you see the greatest gift I have given thee- to love and love those who need Me.

Respond to my calling to aid the ones I love and as you do they will love you too. Reach beyond what you know and the wisdom you shall find as you seek to serve with Me in mind.

Play, pray, be patient with them and you shall find, healing within and a heart divine.

How I will complete you as you help complete them. How you will find you need them. How you will learn you are a part of my plan.

Always know they need you as you need them- for you to show them that I am God, The Father, Protector, and Strength. For you, to see my great wonders, to seek, and to learn to be like Me.

Never lose sight. I have given you this gift because where they are weak, I have made you strong. When they scream out in silence I made you to be an exalting, shouting, voice. I made you for them…and in serving them you will have more of me.

-Jenna M. Howard

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Letter of Comfort

Do I have her eyes, her smile? Did she abandon me? Wasn’t I wanted? Does she have a family now with other children? Does she think about me? Does my birth father know I was even born? Where was I born? Could I have passed them on the street and not known? Was I just a accident to my birth parents? Did they even care? As the years come and go the questions pile up each time I think about how my existence started.

Name: unknown
Birth date: July 24, 1986



Description: Caucasian

WHY? Unknown. There are times during my life when I struggled with all these questions. There would be times when I felt I hated my birth parents for what they did because I didn’t even know why they did it. They didn’t even get a chance to get to know me or even try to take care of me.
Now, my longing is to just know who they are and their story. I want to see my Birth mother one day and I want to thank her. I want her to know I made it. That I have a mom and a dad who love me with every being of their body, have taught me Godly values, and the meaning of unconditional love. That they wiped my tears when I cried, loved me in spite of my flaws, have held my hand when I hurt the most, and I love them. I want them to know who I am because of what they did!

Name: Jenna Marie Howard
Birth Date: July 24th, 1986
Adoption Day: August 8th, 1986
Hospital: N/A
Pat Howard

Jim Howard

Dusty Howard & Li Lou

Julie Howard

I have light brown hair and green eyes. I am 5 ft 4in and a small build. I look like my mom and have the stubbornness and twinkling eyes like my dad. I love to love my family and love that they love me back.
Future: To aid in the rescuing of orphans worldwide!
Thank you mom and dad for giving me a life of love, kindness, discipline, and direction. I would not want another mom or dad and I thank God that he chose me and placed me in your arms!

Throughout my life my parents had always said when I was ready there were some things my birth mother had left for them to give me. My mom and dad made it clear that I never had to have these things if I chose not to. They have always answered the questions I have to the best of their ability. When I was ready I asked my mom about the things she had for me. She told me my birth mother had written me a letter along with a few other things. I asked for the letter. The words below are my birth mother’s words to me. I feel God gave me this gift to share. Parents of adopted children even question the “why’s” as they see their beautiful child grow. This letter didn’t answer all of my questions but then again maybe I wasn’t ready to hear the whole story. I will continue to search when I am ready but for now these words I want to share with the children and parents who will not have this opportunity. Be thankful and find comfort that you have your child, that their birth mother held on for nine months, and gave your beautiful son or daughter life so that they may live it with love and abundance in your arms. I hope these words bring you comfort as they did for me.

My Baby, My beautiful Baby,
Someday you will understand the beauty in this decision. I am a young girl who is just starting her own life. I brought you into this world knowing that I could not give you the love and material things that every child deserves.

My decision was out of love for you. You were so beautiful when I saw you. I can’t even imagine how beautiful you are now.

Me and your father were really in love with each other at one time. He isn’t a bad man. He was young just like me. We were not together when you were born but our hearts were.

When you were born I couldn’t really believe I created you and carried you for nine months. You moved around a lot and boy, did you have a case of the hiccups. You would wake me up in the mornings and help me sleep at night. Those 9months were very important to me.

Well, I have to tell you my mom, your grandmother, is a wonderful woman. She helped me with my decision a lot. If it weren’t for here I would have never made it.

I want you to remember something when you read this letter. You have mom number 1 and mom number 2, and I am mom number 2. Mom number 1 is your mom. She raised and gave you things you needed. You also have Dad number 1 and Dad number 2. Dad number 1 is your father. He’ll be there for you whenever you need him and even when you don’t. He’ll be there to chase off the boys when they start lining up at the door. And your mom, well, let her be a mom to you. She will love knowing that you need her. And your brother, well, let him take care of you. I have a brother and I wish I would have let him take care of me.

The bond you will have for your family will be strong, happy, and full of love. You are a fortunate little girl. Always be thankful for everything. God will watch over all of us and take care of us all.

You are always in my heart.

I love you,
Your Mother

Monday, August 25, 2008


I saw this on a website the other day and it truly gave me hope for China. As the spotlight has shifted to China, because of the 2008 Olympics, people have heard of the terrible things that are happening - the crime rate is up, camps were formed to keep the undesirable people off the streets, work is hard to find, more children are left homeless, the Olympics are fake etc. Yes, those things are happening but in the midst of all the chaos and terrible things occurring, love and hard work find a way to the hearts of the news. We must remember all of the terrible things we hear have always been there. The Olympics are not the cause or the starting point for these things. It has only been a means in which gives reason to this evil. Remember, as you watch that we MUST pray for this nation, and the nations all over the world. That we as Christians must be the light in this dark world when the evil forces are multiplying.

Thursday, August 21, 2008


This article really had me on my knees....
The bleak concrete walls topped with razor wire and the sentries in towers at the gates are a chilling reminder of a different era. On the nearby roads, heavily armed guards patrol relentlessly, checking both drivers and pedestrians, constantly alert. Meanwhile, less than 30 miles away, the world's attention is focused on the world-famous 'Bird's Nest' Olympic stadium and the other venues where a global audience of two billion is watching the Games and enjoying the spectacle of the 'new' China. The Beijing regime has deployed an army of 500,000 smiling volunteers to help foreigners find their way around the teeming capital city. Blades of grass have been individually combed. Signs have been erected in English. Spitting has been banned and taxi drivers have been told to wear ties. But there's none of that here in the suburb of Daxing, where the only 'venues' are the five camps into which thousands of China's 'undesirables' have been swept from the streets of Beijing and locked up. Here, down bumpy, unlit roads, is where old habits die hard for China's brutal totalitarian communist regime. These camps are being used to imprison - without trial or legal representation - people that the regime wants the world to believe do not exist amid the miracle of modern China. From street children, hawkers, the homeless and prostitutes, to the mentally ill, black migrants, drug dealers and gays caught in public bathhouses, the camps on the outskirts of the city started filling up with Beijing's 'undesirables' last year as part of the Chinese regime's determination to present what it sees as an acceptable face to the world.
It is all eerily reminiscent of the build-up to the 1936 Games in Berlin, when the government cleared similar 'undesirables' from the streets. Under Hitler's regime many of the Nazi concentration camps bore the slogan Arbeit macht frei (Work makes you free) at their gates. In China, the camps bear the slogan 'Re-education Through Labour'. (It's a peculiar irony that Beijing has been so determined to use the English language to welcome the world, that street signs even bear the chilling words.) The camps themselves are festooned with banners in Mandarin Chinese stating that 'you must be punished according to the laws of the Olympics', and reveal the extraordinary lengths to which the Chinese are prepared to go to in order to convince the world of the country's success.
Working up to 16 hours a day and held in cramped, unsanitary cells with only one toilet bucket for dozens of inmates, the existence of the jailed 'undesirables' is something China has done its best to hide. The policy of 'people clearances' began last year and those taken in were moved to the camps on the outskirts of Beijing, which were built in the 1960s for the purposes of 'cleansing' the minds of dissidents opposed to the state. By using torture, brainwashing techniques and the use of heavy labor, Chairman Mao was determined to convince opponents of the error of their ways. The camps have been used in more recent times to hold dissidents, lawyers and followers of religions banned by the government. But sweeps of the city ahead of the influx of foreign visitors have meant these dissidents have been joined by a new list of victims, who have until now been allowed to work freely in the capital.
Deploying thousands of undercover police, as well as uniformed groups of youths wearing red shirts and armbands, strenuous efforts have been made to ensure the city has been purged of all 'anti-social' elements. African immigrants to Beijing have been rounded up from popular tourist areas such as San li Tun, Beijing's equivalent of Soho. The patrols of the red- shirted groups are constant.
Even now, with the Games under way, some residents are not safe from arrest and incarceration. 'Tony', a Nigerian entrepreneur who has lived in China for the past three years, watched as dozens of his African friends were arrested last month. He hasn't seen them since.

'I started running when I saw what was happening,' he told me. 'I've heard they are in the camps. I'm just keeping my head down until you lot [foreigners] go and hoping it all returns to normal.'

With the few remaining black people and some gay men banned from entire areas, along with instructions from the authorities that they should not be served in bars or restaurants, witnesses say thousands of others have been bundled into unmarked vans and taken to the camps on the outskirts of the city. According to prison camp sources, who risk incarceration and torture for simply speaking about what happens inside the camps, the 'undesirables' are separated into male and female groups. They are then put to work in vast hangar-like sheds, where they are forced to make chopsticks and soft toys - the very goods that are being peddled on the streets of Beijing to tourists visiting the Olympics. Inmates are forced to work through the night. In some of the other camps - all located in the Tuan He district in the Daxing suburb of Beijing, less than an hour's drive from the Bird's Nest stadium - the ' undesirables' are forced to clean beans and other Chinese foods - which are then sold by the communist authorities to private businesses serving the influx of foreigners.
Punishment is brutal for those who try to resist. According to my camp informant, women who do not work hard enough are stripped naked for days on end - something regarded as particularly shaming in Chinese society. Another favored method of punishment is called the Tiger Bench - where 'undesirables' are forced to sit upright on a long bench with their hands tied behind their backs. Their thighs are also tied to the bench - and bricks placed under the feet to raise them off the floor. Human rights groups say some victims are forced to remain in this position for days on end, causing excruciating pain. Those who complain or refuse to eat in protest at their detention are force-fed - with guards holding their mouths open and tipping food down their victims' gullets, making them choke and vomit. There are more than 1,000 of these camps located around this country of more than 1.3 billion people. In 2005, the authorities opened one Re-education Through Labour Camp to United Nations investigators investigating claims that inmates were being killed and their organs 'harvested' and sold to wealthy Chinese desperate for transplants. Nothing untoward was found. The camp had even been painted ahead of the UN visit. Dissidents claimed later that victims are transferred from camp to camp whenever any brutality is discovered by outside bodies. The sweep of the city is good news for the prison camp guards, who are making extra money from the Olympics. Sources say they are getting as much overtime as they want a result of the thousands of 'undesirables' rounded up.
Phelim Kine, a spokesman for New York-based Human Rights Watch, said: 'The purge of migrants, sex workers and beggars during the Olympics is a reflection of the obsessive concern that nothing can remain on the streets that clashes with the government's carefully applied veneer of "stability" and "harmony". 'Beijing is unique for the unprecedented scale of the campaign to sterilize the city ahead of the Games of elements embarrassing to the Chinese government's status as a rising power.' The existence of the camps - and the admission by Chinese officials that people can be locked up without trial there for up to four years - will add to the growing sense that Beijing is trying to hoodwink the world; with the complicity of the International Olympic Committee.
After British journalists were roughed-up and detained in Tiananmen Square this week, and a relative of the U.S. volleyball coach was murdered by an unemployed Chinese man protesting about government policies, Olympic officials stressed they were 'very proud' about how Beijing 2008 is progressing. When China won the rights to the Olympics, IOC president Jacques Rogge boasted that hosting the Games would improve China's human rights record. Tellingly, Wei Wang, a Chinese official, yesterday denied that his country had made any such promises to improve human rights.

'After 30 years of reform, China has developed greatly. People enjoy more freedom. People are living a good life. Everyone is happy. That's a fact.' he said 'of course, there are exceptions. But they need to take the legal process and procedures to resolve any issues.'

Much the same could have been said in Germany in 1936 - and it would have had just as hollow a ring to it. As Susan Bachrach, a historian and expert on the Berlin Games, says: 'Hosting the Olympics presented the Nazi leadership with an extraordinary opportunity to project the illusion of a peaceful, tolerant Germany under the guise of the Games' spirit of international co-operation.' That effort was largely successful, and the regime scored a major propaganda victory. 'Beijing must hope that its propaganda effort will be every bit as effective.
The Chinese believe that at the end of the Games, most of the world would look back with fond memories, peruse the Olympic fact files, re-watch some of the biggest sporting feats in world history and re tour the fabulous landmark. They want us to believe that they have it all together and what was once said about the nation being corrupt will be a mere comment made by a bitter party. But for those who were deemed 'undesirable' and dumped into prison camps without trial–the African immigrants, beggars, prostitutes, gays, homeless, street children– the memories of the 2008 Olympics will be very different indeed.
By Andrew Malone

"Watch the spectacle, the individual feats of brilliance that perpetuate nationalism by ascribing individual merits and achievements to countries, but don’t lose sight of the forsaken and condemned." -unknown

Ok, now I must say this. This article may be exaggerated or not all truthful. I have not been to these camps myself but the fact still remains that China has gone to great lengths to make there country look like something it is not.BUT DOES IT STOP THERE?! I cannot imagine the pain and embarrassment these 'undesirable' have endured during the times of the Olympics but what if it is not over? Will the government release them now that the games are over? The Government now knows that because of the high standards and impression they made during the Olympics the tourist rate is bound to rise. They know this therefore, they also know they must keep up that spectacle. So where does that leave the many so called 'undesirable'? Is this another Nazi camp where the means to an end is THEIR end? Will they hesitate to kill an orphan child, a homeless man, a prostitute? Is it a means to an end for all the high statistics of child prostitution, slavery, fatherless and unknown people who “waste” their beloved city with their presence? My friends, now is the time to pray. They are "safe" as long as the Olympics are going on but I am afraid soon, the real terror will begin. Their memories, their beings, their souls are something that I do not want lost to history, that I do not want to ignore and cast aside. And neither should you.

I am reminded of the verse 2 Chronicles 7:14
If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land. The Hope for this country is Gods mercy and the salvation He offers. Pray that the churches that follow the Lord are continuously having doors open for them to preach the Word.
Matthew 7:7-8
Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.
God is our only hope and eternal strength.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Attention All: Prayer Needed!

My Family and Friends,
I am homesick and downtrodden. The need is so great to rescue these children and I am overwhelmed by sadness. Pray for me that my strength my be strengthened and sound, my heart heart to push on, and my soul to weep and be healed.

I just had my adoption day and I have been moved to share some precious gifts, some insight into my past, that the Lord has blessed me with. And yet, for a reason I not yet know, I can not write. My heart is not ready to speak and my hands are held still. I must rely on God's timing and guidance in this matter.

Pray that I continue to hold on and push through this time of testing. I am working on some research at the moment for Paul's book and I have had such a hard time finding the answers I need. I am frustrated beyond compare. Satan is alive and well and working hard. PRAY PRAY PRAY...

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

My Answer Lord is Yes!

At the start of this blog I had no idea what I could write about. I have gotten somewhat settled in both places (home and work) and am just now beginning to get homesick. Oh the dreaded desire that every person gets when they leave home, to return home to your loved ones and the comfort of the old life. When I started my first day at World Orphans there was an assignment ready for me. It was to develop a personal ministry plan. As I read through the material many things came as a comfort but the one that I came across that really stuck out to me and applied to exactly what I was beginning to feel was this:

Mastering the First 90 Days in a New Job

Congratulations! You're starting a new job. You've cast aside the security blanket of your previous assignment. You've survived the emotional fits and starts of the hiring process. Now, brimming with confidence, you arrive for the first day of work secure in the knowledge that of all the candidates, you were the one that was identified as having the right combination of skills and attitude for the job. But lingering in the back of your mind are the inevitable questions about whether you made the right move, whether your contribution will be valued, and whether the reality of the new job will live up to its expectations.

How you channel those hopes, dreams and doubts in the first 90 days will set the tone and tenor of your tenure with your new company. You have a limited window of opportunity to create a sustainable advantage for "brand you".

At this point I went WHOA! How great is my God for knowing that I would need that right up front! I had begun to doubt and questioned if I was really hearing God’s call. Evil crept in BUT as I sit now here in my new little cubicle/office on my second day a song pops into my mind by Bob Carlisle “I’m Gonna Be Ready”:

Right over here now, children
Talk to me
We can talk about anything at all
What do you see?
I can see all the lonely people
All of them looking for the answer
All of them listening for that call

The likes of which I can't seem to remember
The likes of which I just can't recall
So how can it be?
That woven with the hope that we have inside us
Still we seem to let those things divide us
That don't amount to anything at all
All your life, you've been prepared
For this single, precious moment in time
When Jesus calls, what will you say?






Right over here, now, children
Talk to me
Anything that's on your mind
What do you see
I can see all the hungry children
Being denied a decent
meal to fill them
Through no fault of their own

All it takes is simple faith
To turn the situa
tion around
Love can break the strongest chains




God spoke to me through that song! This week has been all about songs and I know that the Lord speaks through many things but it is so powerful to me to be able to hear a song pop onto the radio that I know a week before God used to remind my little weak and doubt self that:

“Hey Jenna, it’s me again, child. Listen to me, know me, search me, call out to me, and I will find you…but you must listen….Jenna? Hello? Don’t go there… don’t listen to that Jenna…don’t fall into that…daughter listen to me….are you listening?”

The past two Sunday the pastor has talked about listening and hearing God. The past couple of days have been emotional and tough…partly bc I wanted to do what I wanted and therefore not listen to God…when you step out and don’t listen to God you will always be hit by failure in some shape or fashion or brought down into the darkness. Only when you are in the will of the Lord…only when I AM in the will of the Lord can I truly be successful and a light in this dark world for Christ.

Pray for me as I do for you that we as Christians would strive, stand firm, and shout with our body and soul that: I AM WILLING…I AM READY… I’M HERE…I AM YOURS… AND MY ANSWER, LORD WILL ALWAYS BE YES!

Friday, June 13, 2008


My last day at Print Team is this Friday and I cannot wait! My mind swirls as I think of what the next few weeks will be like with the finality of leaving my job, the final packing, and goodbyes begin. And yet my heart ponders a simple thought as I leave this job and current home: “Did I make a difference?” As I thought back to the past couple of years I realized there has never been a more needed time than right now to make a stand for Christ. It is time for us a Christians to stand firm, to renew and revive the passion. I can remember when I first became a Christian. I wanted to shout it to the world and talk about Christ all the time. Now as I look back I ask myself when that stopped? Why did it? Has that been the reason why I question making an impact? Have I not been as on fire as I should be and therefore fallen short in God’s command to go and witness to the world?

The Great Commission

16Then the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain where Jesus had told them to go. 17When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted. 18Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in[a] the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."


A poem I love says it perfectly and I think as Christians we must stay true to this:

I am a Christian

by Carol Wimmer

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting "I am saved"
I'm whispering "I get lost!"
"That is why I chose this way."

When I say..."I am a Christian"
don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
and need someone to be my guide.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak
and pray for strength to carry on.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
and cannot ever pay the debt.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect,
my flaws are too visible
but God believes I'm worth it.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain
I have my share of heartaches
which is why I seek His name.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I do not wish to judge.

I have no authority.
I only know I'm loved

PRAY FOR OUR FELLOW BELIEVERS! That they may have the stamina and passion to go out and bring the lost and orphaned to Christ. Let us be the tools to bring the Light in this dark world...

There was a woman who stood alone in a dark room with a single candle. The candle put off little light in the room and therefore she kept stumbling over obstacles and things in her path that the light could not touch. She needed something…anything to help light up the room. Then suddenly she found something…another person. The person she found had a candle but had been searching for someone to help them light it. She lit it and soon together, with both candles lit, they could see more of the room….the room was filled with other people stumbling around asking for someone to light their candle. They were lost in the dark with no one to light the candle. Not many saw the first lady’s light because there were so many things blocking the view but when two stood side by side and more were found and their candles were lit, more and more people seemed to find the light. As Christians let us be the ones to light that first candle and together reach more lost people than we could alone.

Hi Jimbo

Thursday, May 29, 2008


well, the weeks are starting to count down and nerves are beginning to set. I wait in anticipation of my new job and the move but something has plagued my mind in the recent weeks as I see God's hand move in my life.

Has life always been complicated but by being in the so called "rat race" our eyes have been blinded to the truth? That truth being there more to life than making money, going to church, and doing daily duties that you feel completes your life-having the ME syndrome. Are we so wrapped up in what we do that the minute we stop, our emotions are solely focused on how WE feel and what WE want? Are we that self focused on making a living or getting enough money that we don’t realize we have become a different person?

As Christians it is so hard for me to understand the ME concept so many have but as I look at the past year I have realized I have fallen into that category. Not only have I been self absorbed in my walk (asking God for things and not stopping actually listen to Him) but I have allowed myself to fall into a pit of uncertainty. Will I have enough money to pay bills? Will I meet all expectations in my new job? Will I make friends? What happens if someone at home gets sick and I’m not there? What if I can’t...? STOP!!!! Stop, I tell myself. All of those questions have one thing in common...the word "I". I am no longer just me. I am no longer my own ruler or for that matter the only one on this planet! So why must I refer to me as being the only one in this world? There are thousand to millions of children gasping for breath as they run and hide from abuse, slavery, or children who cry bc there is no one to turn to, no hope for tomorrow. And here I am selfish, vain, seeking my own satisfaction and personal gain when I have EVERYTHING I need-Jesus Christ. There are times when I am flabbergasted by how self absorbed we (myself included) are now. I CAN eat; I CAN walk down the street and not be filled with terror. I have money, clothes, a home, love and most importantly knowing Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and Savior. BUT I also have those things to give! the bible tells us:

Acts 20:35 “In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: 'It is more blessed to give than to receive. “

With this said I do not think Jesus meant give bc it will make you feel good. That places you right back in the center of you own little word and in the "me me me" scenario once again. But when you give, give in Christ. I have never felt more satisfied than when I gave for Christ and He used little ol’ me as a tool, a messenger of God’s love. Selfless giving…not In hopes you’ll get something back.

Henry Ford said this "To do more for the world than the world does for you - that is success."

My confusion stems from the idea of why is it so hard for people to grasp these 2 concepts
1.) it is not all about them
2.) why is it so hard for people to give selflessly?
these questions I have pondered bc I myself fall into the category of this. I weep at the thought of Jesus nailed to the Cross taking our sins and selfish “me” syndrome upon Himself. Our lives would not even be of consequence if Jesus said “you know what, this stinks. I didn’t do anything wrong. I don’t like doing any of this. It’s not MY problem. I’M perfect. I want to go home. This isn’t fair. I had to leave MY home and MY good clothes and shoes and walk around teaching people who don’t even care about ME.” And just got off the cross and went home. But he didn’t. he gave…selflessly. Jesus told us to walk in the likeness of Him. How is it then, that Jesus ,out of selfless unconditional love, took it upon Himself and gave His life- the only way for us to heaven,-and we can’t even give anything -a meal, a smile, 10 dollars, or even stop to say a prayer-to help those who need Him the most. I do not say this as a person who is being preachy or above this. I’m telling myself as well that we were not put on this earth to live day by day in a self absorbed or self centered lifestyle. We were placed on this earth to give glory to God and bring aid to those who have not found Him but are searching for someone to take time to share His love. Give…Give in God’s glory.

Pray for me as I pray for you in hope that Christ will continue to be real in our lives.

Pray as I ponder the question: Is there ever a perfect medium to walking in faith or being absorbed in it?

Monday, May 19, 2008

Poems and such...

Help Me... Find Me... -Jenna Howard

She cries out for rescue dark in the night,
He stumbles and falls, too afraid to fight,
She sobs in her rags all tattered and torn,
He run for his life all battered and worn,
She falls to her face in a puddle of mud,
He cries out for help all covered in blood,
She screams in terror as they drag her away,
He stills as they laugh, he stills as they prey,
Help me she prays…Find me he says…
No longer can they hide… no farther to run…
And slowly they know this life has just begun…

Lullaby for God’s Child -Jenna Howard

I’m right here child holding your hand,
Sleep now and don’t be sad
For tomorrow will bring hope, love, and a life
A time to learn of a man named Christ.
You’ll learn of His life, His heart and His love
His way, His might, and His power above.
No longer alone, no longer unloved.
For He has given you a home filled with love.
So sleep now child and don’t be afraid
For He has given you life, and THE love that won’t fade.

Prayer of Abandonment

Father, I abandon myself into your hands;
do with me what you will.
Whatever you may do, I thank you:
I am ready for all, I accept all.
Let only your will be done in me,
and in all Your creatures -
I wish no more than this, O Lord.

Into your hands I commend my soul;
I offer it to you with all the love of my heart,
for I love you Lord,
and so need to give myself,
to surrender myself into your hands,
without reserve,
and with boundless confidence,

For you are my Father.

--Charles de Foucauld (1858-1916)

Friday, May 16, 2008


I am excited to announce that I have just recently been offered an opportunity to work with World Orphans in a full-time position. The position is in Monument, Colorado doing all of the Public Relations work for them. My main goals will be to create avenues of awareness and generate possible ways to reach people. This is such a wonderful opportunity for me. Not only will I have many areas in which to focus my creative and organizational skills, but I'll have the added benefit of doing it around the most passionate people I've ever met.

On a more personal note, as many of you may know, I am adopted. Before I was even born, Christ had a plan for me and saw fit to place me in the arms of God-loving people. That path was chosen for me and, because of it, I find comfort and great joy in knowing I am to use my talents to help aid orphans all over the world. I want to help give as many children as possible the same opportunity I had to experience God’s real and abounding love with the help of a home and guidance.

My hope is that I will remain with World Orphans for many years to come, however, in order for me to accomplish this I need your help. World Orphans operates as a non-profit organization so in order to keep me employed, and to continue to do the Lord's work, I am responsible for supplementing the remainder of my salary each year through fund-raising. A mere $13,000 each year will allow me to continue doing the work of the Lord by helping orphans all over the world. I am praying for the will of the Lord to be done in this matter and continuing to keep the faith that God will provide. If you are able, there are two ways in which you can help me.

First and foremost, pray for me as I undertake this step in faith. I will be taking a new job, assuming new responsibilities, and moving far away from my family. Secondly, if you feel God’s calling, give. You can do this as a one-time donation to help offset my initial expenses or you can give on an ongoing basis to provide part of my much needed support throughout the year.

Both of these are needed and neither is greater than the other. I ask each one of you to give in your own way. This will allow me to spend my time working and focused solely on World Orphans and not fund-raising for my own needs. If you do choose to give please send your support to:

World Orphans, ATTN: JH-01

1840 Woodmoor Drive, suite 100,

Monument, CO 80132

In the memo line put the code JH-01.

And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them and said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. “Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me, but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea.
(Matthew 18:2-6 ESV)

As we have been called to receive a child and by so doing bring him up in the likeness of Christ, we are glorifying God. Not only is it a command it is also a gift for God to use us as instruments to show His love to these children. “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.” -Proverbs 22:6 Each child has been chosen by God and now God has instructed me to be a tool to help reach these children. I have chosen to follow Christ’s instructions by helping these children just as my parents chose to follow Christ’s instructions to help me, to give me life, to guide me, and give me a Christ centered home.”Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed. Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked." Psalm 82:3-4


WORLD ORPHANS rescues orphaned and abandoned children in a way that increases the goodwill, exposure, and witnessing opportunities for the local indigenous churches that are willing to care or are already caring for them. A local church is the best way to care for orphans – to see children raised in a compassionate community of believers; to be cared for; to know, love, and share God’s love. But church-based orphan homes are also an excellent way to increase the attractiveness of that local church to its community as it sees their church caring for their children. That’s how we help. We fund the building of church-based orphan homes.