Thursday, May 29, 2008


well, the weeks are starting to count down and nerves are beginning to set. I wait in anticipation of my new job and the move but something has plagued my mind in the recent weeks as I see God's hand move in my life.

Has life always been complicated but by being in the so called "rat race" our eyes have been blinded to the truth? That truth being there more to life than making money, going to church, and doing daily duties that you feel completes your life-having the ME syndrome. Are we so wrapped up in what we do that the minute we stop, our emotions are solely focused on how WE feel and what WE want? Are we that self focused on making a living or getting enough money that we don’t realize we have become a different person?

As Christians it is so hard for me to understand the ME concept so many have but as I look at the past year I have realized I have fallen into that category. Not only have I been self absorbed in my walk (asking God for things and not stopping actually listen to Him) but I have allowed myself to fall into a pit of uncertainty. Will I have enough money to pay bills? Will I meet all expectations in my new job? Will I make friends? What happens if someone at home gets sick and I’m not there? What if I can’t...? STOP!!!! Stop, I tell myself. All of those questions have one thing in common...the word "I". I am no longer just me. I am no longer my own ruler or for that matter the only one on this planet! So why must I refer to me as being the only one in this world? There are thousand to millions of children gasping for breath as they run and hide from abuse, slavery, or children who cry bc there is no one to turn to, no hope for tomorrow. And here I am selfish, vain, seeking my own satisfaction and personal gain when I have EVERYTHING I need-Jesus Christ. There are times when I am flabbergasted by how self absorbed we (myself included) are now. I CAN eat; I CAN walk down the street and not be filled with terror. I have money, clothes, a home, love and most importantly knowing Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and Savior. BUT I also have those things to give! the bible tells us:

Acts 20:35 “In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: 'It is more blessed to give than to receive. “

With this said I do not think Jesus meant give bc it will make you feel good. That places you right back in the center of you own little word and in the "me me me" scenario once again. But when you give, give in Christ. I have never felt more satisfied than when I gave for Christ and He used little ol’ me as a tool, a messenger of God’s love. Selfless giving…not In hopes you’ll get something back.

Henry Ford said this "To do more for the world than the world does for you - that is success."

My confusion stems from the idea of why is it so hard for people to grasp these 2 concepts
1.) it is not all about them
2.) why is it so hard for people to give selflessly?
these questions I have pondered bc I myself fall into the category of this. I weep at the thought of Jesus nailed to the Cross taking our sins and selfish “me” syndrome upon Himself. Our lives would not even be of consequence if Jesus said “you know what, this stinks. I didn’t do anything wrong. I don’t like doing any of this. It’s not MY problem. I’M perfect. I want to go home. This isn’t fair. I had to leave MY home and MY good clothes and shoes and walk around teaching people who don’t even care about ME.” And just got off the cross and went home. But he didn’t. he gave…selflessly. Jesus told us to walk in the likeness of Him. How is it then, that Jesus ,out of selfless unconditional love, took it upon Himself and gave His life- the only way for us to heaven,-and we can’t even give anything -a meal, a smile, 10 dollars, or even stop to say a prayer-to help those who need Him the most. I do not say this as a person who is being preachy or above this. I’m telling myself as well that we were not put on this earth to live day by day in a self absorbed or self centered lifestyle. We were placed on this earth to give glory to God and bring aid to those who have not found Him but are searching for someone to take time to share His love. Give…Give in God’s glory.

Pray for me as I pray for you in hope that Christ will continue to be real in our lives.

Pray as I ponder the question: Is there ever a perfect medium to walking in faith or being absorbed in it?

Monday, May 19, 2008

Poems and such...

Help Me... Find Me... -Jenna Howard

She cries out for rescue dark in the night,
He stumbles and falls, too afraid to fight,
She sobs in her rags all tattered and torn,
He run for his life all battered and worn,
She falls to her face in a puddle of mud,
He cries out for help all covered in blood,
She screams in terror as they drag her away,
He stills as they laugh, he stills as they prey,
Help me she prays…Find me he says…
No longer can they hide… no farther to run…
And slowly they know this life has just begun…

Lullaby for God’s Child -Jenna Howard

I’m right here child holding your hand,
Sleep now and don’t be sad
For tomorrow will bring hope, love, and a life
A time to learn of a man named Christ.
You’ll learn of His life, His heart and His love
His way, His might, and His power above.
No longer alone, no longer unloved.
For He has given you a home filled with love.
So sleep now child and don’t be afraid
For He has given you life, and THE love that won’t fade.

Prayer of Abandonment

Father, I abandon myself into your hands;
do with me what you will.
Whatever you may do, I thank you:
I am ready for all, I accept all.
Let only your will be done in me,
and in all Your creatures -
I wish no more than this, O Lord.

Into your hands I commend my soul;
I offer it to you with all the love of my heart,
for I love you Lord,
and so need to give myself,
to surrender myself into your hands,
without reserve,
and with boundless confidence,

For you are my Father.

--Charles de Foucauld (1858-1916)

Friday, May 16, 2008


I am excited to announce that I have just recently been offered an opportunity to work with World Orphans in a full-time position. The position is in Monument, Colorado doing all of the Public Relations work for them. My main goals will be to create avenues of awareness and generate possible ways to reach people. This is such a wonderful opportunity for me. Not only will I have many areas in which to focus my creative and organizational skills, but I'll have the added benefit of doing it around the most passionate people I've ever met.

On a more personal note, as many of you may know, I am adopted. Before I was even born, Christ had a plan for me and saw fit to place me in the arms of God-loving people. That path was chosen for me and, because of it, I find comfort and great joy in knowing I am to use my talents to help aid orphans all over the world. I want to help give as many children as possible the same opportunity I had to experience God’s real and abounding love with the help of a home and guidance.

My hope is that I will remain with World Orphans for many years to come, however, in order for me to accomplish this I need your help. World Orphans operates as a non-profit organization so in order to keep me employed, and to continue to do the Lord's work, I am responsible for supplementing the remainder of my salary each year through fund-raising. A mere $13,000 each year will allow me to continue doing the work of the Lord by helping orphans all over the world. I am praying for the will of the Lord to be done in this matter and continuing to keep the faith that God will provide. If you are able, there are two ways in which you can help me.

First and foremost, pray for me as I undertake this step in faith. I will be taking a new job, assuming new responsibilities, and moving far away from my family. Secondly, if you feel God’s calling, give. You can do this as a one-time donation to help offset my initial expenses or you can give on an ongoing basis to provide part of my much needed support throughout the year.

Both of these are needed and neither is greater than the other. I ask each one of you to give in your own way. This will allow me to spend my time working and focused solely on World Orphans and not fund-raising for my own needs. If you do choose to give please send your support to:

World Orphans, ATTN: JH-01

1840 Woodmoor Drive, suite 100,

Monument, CO 80132

In the memo line put the code JH-01.

And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them and said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. “Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me, but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea.
(Matthew 18:2-6 ESV)

As we have been called to receive a child and by so doing bring him up in the likeness of Christ, we are glorifying God. Not only is it a command it is also a gift for God to use us as instruments to show His love to these children. “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.” -Proverbs 22:6 Each child has been chosen by God and now God has instructed me to be a tool to help reach these children. I have chosen to follow Christ’s instructions by helping these children just as my parents chose to follow Christ’s instructions to help me, to give me life, to guide me, and give me a Christ centered home.”Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed. Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked." Psalm 82:3-4


WORLD ORPHANS rescues orphaned and abandoned children in a way that increases the goodwill, exposure, and witnessing opportunities for the local indigenous churches that are willing to care or are already caring for them. A local church is the best way to care for orphans – to see children raised in a compassionate community of believers; to be cared for; to know, love, and share God’s love. But church-based orphan homes are also an excellent way to increase the attractiveness of that local church to its community as it sees their church caring for their children. That’s how we help. We fund the building of church-based orphan homes.